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-Harry Knowles www.aintitcoolnews.com

After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she said, “especially the really tight pants and all of the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents.”

Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What on earth do you mean?” “Well, I saw them flip a coin and one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: “Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!”

Well, the Escrow and Loan paperwork are all signed and in the mail. Escrow is set to close on November 13st. The seller’s new house went into probate so our move-in date has moved back to December 14th. The seller is going to pay our rent till then so all is good. On a side note the ‘Big M’ will not be leaving the family as Phil and Jenn (and maybe Andy) have shown interest in moving in after we are gone. So despite the fact the local fires are making us cringe because our Hazard insurance has not been signed yet (Loan must be in place before our insurance company even gets the request) All seems to be falling into place. Next up on the hit parade is figuring out what to set my deductions at so I can pay for these digs. Look out Money 2003…here I come.

Out of Time (1.5 of 5)
Denzel/Florida/Dirty cops intriguing story-why only 2 stars? cause it was BORING!!!. It gets 1 point for being in focus. I went to the theater to see The Rundown, which despite what Yahoo Movies said, was not playing at my local theater. So Deb and I decided to see the next available movie. We have skipped over our normal theater going schedule to work on securing our new house, so 90% percent of the films playing we have not seen. I knew the film was a Elmore Leonard wannabe with a sub par film crew and uninspired performances throughout-but I knew it was going to be better than Good Boy. Well it just wasn-t worth it. Most of the time was spent ripping apart what was on screen: GPS-s working inside cases, shoddy police work, and god only knows what was in Denzel-s hair in that one scene. All the Episodes of Cold Case/CSI/Law and Order etc-were better than this 9 Dollar film. We figured it out way too early. The only laughs in the film wouldn-t even have registered in any other film. Ahhhhhhh it was almost like paying to see an Indie!!

The current Anti-Piracy adds playing at the theaters for some reason seem a bit odd, then Deborah pointed it out. The-PAINTER- is wearing a Skull and Crossbones on his hat-A PIRATE HAT-I sense a mixed message here. My take on piracy is a bit different-if you get caught with the contraband-you pay the people you stole it from-that-s it-so don-t get caught. Also-painter- is a Union job-so I don-t know what he is bitching about-he he.

Fires:
What were you thinking living in a canyon surrounded by brush with a wood shake roof-how the hell did you even get homeowner insurance? That being said-can the perp firebugs that started all this be burned on live TV?-that would be cool.
We are at war people-all safety measures must be taken, you cant just hope and pray that bad things wont happen. Boy Scout your life-then you can be comfortable.

Mike Moore:
Finally saw Bowling for Columbine. More or less it takes a look at the gun culture of the USA. A member of the NRA and sharpshooter as a child, Moore shows us what the gun culture has done to families involving the Flint Murders, Columbine and the Oklahoma Bombing. All having ties to Michigan (betcha didnt know that!!). And in his very entertaining way shows how dumb white people are in this county. Not really sure where Mike stands on this stuff, but there is a reason people want guns, and a reason white people fear blacks and neither was really examined. He just chalked it up to dumb white people. He gets K-mart to stop selling handgun ammo and almost gets Charlton Heston to say the truth about why there is so much gun violence in the US (Canada has the same percentage of guns and only 30 deaths a year, if you are real smart you could figure why on your own…hint:It’s a color that is not in the rainbow). Bowling was an entertaining film but his first film-Roger and Me- was better overall .-Roger and Me- is about the demise of his hometown of Flint Michigan when GM decides to close the Car Plant that kept the city alive. Politically I was against his views…but he has a way of making the film entertaining none the less.

The days were turning cooler as the embers of early battles througout the land erupted like a boiling caldron. And as the armies of the many lands raged, the Legion held strong in its homeland.

The first incursion came from the Red Desert Warriors of the Southwest. But the proud SpiralHorns fought valiantly and, at days end, the invaders were demoralized and routed.

Then, with many eyes throughout the land watching, the Legion met the Dark Falconers of the Southeast. But this old foe proved no match, and the homeland remained secure.

Rejoicing was brief as word came that the Emerald Bay Brigade was marching on the homeland. Many minds within the Clan of SpiralHorns regarded the impending battle as the first true test of the Legion in its recent defense of the Homeland.

And so, AvengerRam spoke unto the Legion, and said: “Sound your battle cries, my friends. We shall defend the homeland once more, and destroy our attackers as they come. And we shall then march forth and show the armies of the many lands that it is the Legion of SpiralHorns who stand ready to put fear in their hearts!”

The wind blew from the North. The Emerald Bay Brigade would arrive soon.

Kill Bill (3.4 of 5)
Where to begin-.In Quentin style-the middle. The marquee piece of this film is the Battle at the house of blue leaves. A series of extended crane and stedycam shots that followed the whereabouts and fighting of some 80 participants. Shots that put Scorsese to shame and made the Disney execs cringe with the over all amount of blood loss. The dynamic colors of the entire film are wonderful, but in the middle of the biggest fight of them all- Quentin goes black and white. Can-t place the homage he was going for here. And it irritated me more than style was probably supposed too, here I was salivating at what would become a Technicolor blood fest, and I was bounced back to Seven samurai!!!. Only other cheese-out to me was the beeping whenever-The Bride-s- name was mentioned, She was supposed to be Eastwood-s-Man with no name- but come on-. just cut it out. The real power of the film was the ability to bring Hardcore Anime to life, much in the same way that The Matrix did. Oh yea , Lucy-s life was explained using Anime, and it worked very well indeed. Not a lot of Tarintino dialog, but the cool factor still permeated through the entire film. Uma was great and her journey is intriguing to follow. Limbs fly off people like Nerf rockets, so be forewarned when taking the squeamish to the film. The truly bright point to me was the scenes with Sonny Chiba. He had a style and class that raised the bar from a grind house pic to something a little more lasting. I am going to hold judgment on the Power Jew-s decision to make the film two parts when I see Volume II in February. But so far there were a few places that could use a trim in Volume I.

Had a wild day yesterday. Voted for our next governor of Callefornea…along with 3,567,754 other like-minded people. The next 6 months are going to be a wild ride. I also added another challenge to my life by putting a bid on a house. Your transformation to adulthood is almost complete, young padewan… Commence balding and stress NOW…too late.

Here is one more reason to separate Norcal and Socal to separate states:

Just wanted to chime in on the recent Rush resignation. First off, Rush is too good for Disney and the fact that he says things that people don-t want to hear, he is a bit to harsh for commercial television in general. All REAL football fans agree with Rush. I tivo-d ESPN Sunday just so I could hear rush argue with the jocks, just like all of us would if we were in there. All 4 weeks were great. Rush was wonderful, every argument was fun, accurate, and scared the piss out of Irvin and Young a few times when they found out how much really knew about football. And when he said the statement below, boomer and jocks agreed Donovan was held to far too high a standard.

Rushes Statement:- I think what we’ve had here is a little social concern in the NFL. The media has been very desirous that a black quarterback do well. There is a little hope invested in McNabb, and he got a lot of credit for the performance of this team that he didn’t deserve. The defense carried this team.”

What everybody heard:-Because he is black, we are trying to hard to like him-

The Truth as I see it: If you take the exact situation and insert a white guy-let say Trent Dilfer or Brad Johnson, both average quarterbacks with great defenses. You would see that the top 5 status the Donavan constantly gets in the media is puzzling. Trent and Brad are not top 5 quarterbacks-yet both have rings. The fact that he is black in a predominantly black market is the reason he garners so much attention. Is he an average (race not withstanding) quarterback in the NFL?-well look at his stats for the past 5 years-.and you will see that he is. The slump in the one thing that made the Eagles great, the Defense, has had a direct connection to Donavan-s poor play as of late. And why is that-. because he is average-he is not a Brett Farve or Steve McNair, that can lead a sub-par team to the promised land. . Rush knows Donovan belongs in the NFL and is a good quarterback, but Donovan has not shown anything in his entire career that warrants this much attention or the media and fans holding him up to a bar he was never at in the first place.

In Closing: Rush needs an environment where everyone knows it is commentary, and Disney is not it.-Best Damn Sports Show- on FOX would fit him better. But alas Rush is far too classy for that show. I guess it is nice to see that ratings don-t mean that much anymore-since he was on-Rush gained that show 12 points. Disney must be becoming a more personal company to allow him to leave-.snicker.

Rams looked unstoppable-albeit it was against the cardinals, but all the cylinders were firing and the luck factor fell our way many times. We punted once, and the weak link was actually Bulger. He had a 272/2 touchdown day. But was a total of 10 feet from a 380/5 touchdown day. The O-line looked-Superbowl- and kept Bulger clean for the entire game. The D was on fire, 70% of the blitzes worked and the Cardnial-Super Rookie- WR was never heard from. Now we have a bye-and return full throttle with return of WR Curtis and FS Sehorn in two weeks.
On a side note : the ass-ripping dismantling of the 49ers by Minnesota was almost as satisfying as Rams Game. The 4th Quarter collapse of the Chargers was the only thing that kept the Haas Tri-Fecta from coming to fruition.

Arnold: Agreed with McClintock on most issues and attacked Davis and Cruz Bustamante for their failed programs and fiscal policies.

Camejo: Attacked Bush-It-s a California campaign!!…idiot. and said corporations get away with too much. Left Davis alone and attacked Arnold and Tom. Came off as a Socialist…good luck with that one.

Huffington: Attacked everyone (Bush Included) except Camejo. And didn-t bring up a single solution except take out corporate loopholes-. Great idea-charge businesses more-Oh that will keep them here. Made personal attacks on Arnold and Cruz….she really is the ultimate Ex-Wife.

McClintock: Has a long line of solutions, but was too much brain and not enough personality, and doesn-t look like he can bend enough to get things passed. And he didnt confront Arnold at all. Tom is a great man in the wrong state.

Cruz Bustamante: Took most of the attacks in stride but in a truly-You don-t understand- condescending way. Only solutions were more spending on colleges and Latinos-huh?

Who am I voting for: Arnold
Why am I voting for him: He is the one that can cater to both sides, but still stop the spending. Fiscal health is his number one priority.

1. Your right…minorities ARE to stupid to vote, thank you 9th court and ACLU for pointing this out.
2. Davis: Illegal immigrants need to learn how to drive…yea in their own county lets drive them there.
3. Busta’mencha’ is fiscally the same and socially worse than Davis…And he is winning the polls…way to go CA.
4. Union Problem Number 1…when the state suffers…they don’t.
5. Union Problem Number 2…70% of Union workers are Raider Fans.
6. As I start to feel sympathy for the Palestinians and Islamics, all I have to do is watch those planes take out 2500 innocents…then I have no support for people of that mentality. Thank God for anniversaries.
7. Ok…just to clear it up…We were attacked…Islamic Terrorists were to blame…We asked all the countries to help us kill all the terrorists…2 countries said ‘Fuck You’… both have new governments now…The next country to hinder us from this plan…will have a new government too.

A full report on the wedding and honeymoon from both Deb and I will be posted soon. Including all the TableCam pics and professional pics too. So keep checking the gallery for updates.

In other news: Rams – Game 1 – Lose
Well the season started poorly for the rams, but I still have a positive outlook on the season. The interior of the O-Line failed and Warner got knocked silly, even getting a concussion in the second. After the headache wore off in the fourth it was too late. The Third wide receiver McDonald fell and ran incorrect routes all night. And Marshall seemed to be able to do nothing with the ball. NY-s Defense was on fire-. but so was ours-. holding their offense to 17 points-and every point was a struggle for them. Warner is out for this weekend against the 49ers. But I have a good vibe that Bulger will tear them up. All the problems are fixable and our 20th schedule should keep us on top till the end. Having Sehorn and Curtis back after the fifth week bye will be like hitting the Nitro button.

Construction for the wedding has had me a bit behind in most other things, but I think we are on track with a little more than a week to go.
Photo: Go – Video: Go – Hall: Go – DJ: Go – Pastor: Go – Honeymoon: Go- Rehearsal Dinner: Go- Stress: Go
All Fees are paid and only the elbow grease is left.
Still to go: Dress Alteration, Rear Screen (sew and paint), Paint Centerpieces, Program Printing, Seating Chart, Gift Box, Two More cuff Links, Organza Cutting

Amidst all of this the Rams played their second preseason game against the Superbowl champs Tampa Bay Buccaneers. This outing was much more solid and even without Marshall, Williams, Sehorn and Pace the team looked ready. Kurt Warner was on his game even though no passes went over 15 years. Each pass was a bullet and hit everyone in stride and on the numbers. The Rams marched all they way down the field on the number one defense without a glitch. The Defense kept all TB-s first string out of the end zone and scored a defensive touchdown to boot. Got the juices flowing and now can-t wait for the season to start.

S.W.A.T. (3.2 of 5)
Always digged they way Mark Shera whipped that repel rope around to the theme music way back before Star Wars made me all glassy eyed for sci-fi. That was one of the many instances of childhood TV that made me like the intros more than the show itself. Maybe I am built to cut trailers and intros more than anything else. Anyways-the 2003 version of S.W.A.T is basically a big budget version of FX’s-The Shield–if you love that show-you will love this movie. But there lies the problem–The Shield- is a TV show- I don-t want a TV show on the big screen. I pay the 8 bucks to take me farther, show me the bullet taking the guy down, show the cussing, and show the explosions. The written story is a good one: Make a misfit S.W.A.T. team, arrest the biggest crime lords son, offer 100 million to anyone who busts him out, drama and explosions galore. But the film is shot a little to episodically and the emotion of the situations is lost. The biggest problem for me was the restraints of the PG-13 rating they were going for. This needed to be gritty and it couldn-t be. The right people were in place: Colin was perfect, Jackson was perfect, Hell, even Josh Charles was perfect. But it all just clicked on a lower level that I wanted it to. But that-s just me-I ALWAYS want True Lies and T2. And a side note, while I understand when a trailer is made it is sometimes early in the editing phase of a film, and a shot or scene in the trailer is omitted from the final cut. This time around there were easily 4 shots and scenes cut from the trailer. When Michelle says-cause it tickles me- in the trailer-it was a deciding factor in me seeing the movie-and after watching the film-It needed it back in!

My Platform:
1. Thumbprint added to all ID services.
2. Government takes over Utilities (Gas Water Electric)
3. Cut all redundant Social Programs (some programs exist on state and county and city levels- Basically cut every job Gumby …created.. in the last 4 years)
4. Allow San Fernando Valley to succeed from LA County…come on they deserve it.
5. Split State in 2 along Kern County. (Win/Win they lose all the immigration problems, we lose all the voting that created them… I don’t want to govern NorCals anyways)
6. School vouchers!!! (see below)
7. Widen the freeways, remove all carpool lanes, make all freeways like the 105 (trains and all)
8. State Run Bullet Train Union Station to Vegas (or legalize gambling take your pick)
9. Legalize and regulate Marijuana
10 Remove all affirmative action, But make state run loans available at 1% over prime to all regardless of location or race.
11 Lower over-tax on tobacco.
12 Flat-Tax income to 1% for California.
13 Sales tax to 5%.
14 Repeal Car Tax
15 Repeal Family Leave Bill
16 Cap Workman’s Comp.
17 Tax free ‘First Year’ for Business over 50 Employees.
18 Chino Prison Expansion
19 Loser pays the bills if State Grand Jury finds lawsuit frivolous.

How to solve the school problem:
Eighth grade mandatory testing for advancement.
9-12 school vouchers cover 50% while-Alumni Fund- covers other 50% of costs.
Result: taxpayers pay for the schools they use.
Alumni fund is a 1% tax of a students income for the first 20 years after graduation.
Result: Turn out better students = schools get more money
Mandatory testing for voucher teachers every 2 years/ 4 years for tenured teachers.
Result: Weed out the bad eggs
Huge startup cost for this system…but will pay back in droves in less than 6 years.

And a message to the feds……………I’m coming baby!!!!